Life has been busy, but it's been a good busy. Since my last post, we've purchased our first house! We closed on May 30, but still have the apartment until the end of June, so we're moving over in dribbles.
I'm listening to my dh ooh and aah over various treasures that have been in storage for the last 5 years. I wonder if they'll end up in storage again! I'm determined to cut things down and give away a lot of stuff, but he likes to hold on to every single book he purchases. I have the feeling our basement will be lined with books.
Yay! Dh just dug up a pair of shoes that I bought a couple of years ago and couldn't find. Now I can throw out my old ones that are falling apart!
I'm also pregnant! Due date is the end of Jan 2009, so I'm about 8 weeks along now. I've been spotting and bleeding for the last few days, so I'm worried we might end up with another miscarriage. We spent 3 hours in the ER today, trying to get an ultrasound done so we could see if all was okay with baby, but eventually we left because it was taking too long.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Saturday, March 1, 2008
We've leapt
It's officially the first hour of the day after leap day here; we have officially leapt. I feel that I've leapt passed a few things, too.
I'm feeling a bit better about things, even though this winter continues to hammer us. The fact that I don't have any pressing deadlines other than work is starting to sink in...and I like it! It's a joy to come home and know that it's just the same ol' routine with the monkey and my dh.
The monkey is growing by leaps and bounds! He has a miraculous memory (which I completely attribute to my dh, I have a brain like a sieve in comparison) and after we have read him a new book, he will "read" it with us the next time through. He loves anything with colours, animals and (of course) vehicles of any nature. Dh does the bedtime routine now and it's heart-melting to hear the story alternate between a deep voice and a tiny one.
He's also starting to read on his own. For a while it was hard to tell because he has such a fantastic memory and I couldn't be sure if it was him repeating or reading. But the other day, we were in the elevator and he read the numbers as we were going down and then read them going up the same night. He got them all, except for 9, which he called 6. (And who can blame him, it really is a 6, just upside down!)
The monkey is also in love with Lego Star Wars, which we have for our Wii. I have to admit that it's a little disturbing to see how crazy he goes with the remote, thinking it's a light saber. But it's purely play and I can tell he knows the difference between play and how to behave outside of it. He's also playing "Follow the leader" and "Simon says." We have some board games that we've been teaching him. I tend to be lax about the rules and just let him lead, but dh wants him to learn them, so we're a little different that way. Either way, it's lots of fun!
We've also started to look at buying a house! This is super-exciting news for this former farmgirl who has been stuck inside an apartment for over 10 years. Most likely it will be a townhome, but still it is a step up. We saw one that we really liked last Friday and were prepared to offer, but were beat out by someone else. However, it appears that most of the other places in the area are similar, so we will just bide our time until something comes up. We have some pretty tight budget and location requirements, mostly due to not wanting to switch the monkey's daycare; this area met both quite well.
Still struggling with putting in a cleaning routine. When you've had to wing it for so long, it becomes second nature to go in spurts; hopefully something will form soon. I can't wait until this winter is done. I take the monkey to daycare in a stroller and it is very tough going when the sidewalks aren't ploughed. I would sooner have a cold day than a snow day anytime.
So yes, a bit more satisfied with life right now. Feeling a bit more able to let my guard down and be myself. What a great feeling.
I'm feeling a bit better about things, even though this winter continues to hammer us. The fact that I don't have any pressing deadlines other than work is starting to sink in...and I like it! It's a joy to come home and know that it's just the same ol' routine with the monkey and my dh.
The monkey is growing by leaps and bounds! He has a miraculous memory (which I completely attribute to my dh, I have a brain like a sieve in comparison) and after we have read him a new book, he will "read" it with us the next time through. He loves anything with colours, animals and (of course) vehicles of any nature. Dh does the bedtime routine now and it's heart-melting to hear the story alternate between a deep voice and a tiny one.
He's also starting to read on his own. For a while it was hard to tell because he has such a fantastic memory and I couldn't be sure if it was him repeating or reading. But the other day, we were in the elevator and he read the numbers as we were going down and then read them going up the same night. He got them all, except for 9, which he called 6. (And who can blame him, it really is a 6, just upside down!)
The monkey is also in love with Lego Star Wars, which we have for our Wii. I have to admit that it's a little disturbing to see how crazy he goes with the remote, thinking it's a light saber. But it's purely play and I can tell he knows the difference between play and how to behave outside of it. He's also playing "Follow the leader" and "Simon says." We have some board games that we've been teaching him. I tend to be lax about the rules and just let him lead, but dh wants him to learn them, so we're a little different that way. Either way, it's lots of fun!
We've also started to look at buying a house! This is super-exciting news for this former farmgirl who has been stuck inside an apartment for over 10 years. Most likely it will be a townhome, but still it is a step up. We saw one that we really liked last Friday and were prepared to offer, but were beat out by someone else. However, it appears that most of the other places in the area are similar, so we will just bide our time until something comes up. We have some pretty tight budget and location requirements, mostly due to not wanting to switch the monkey's daycare; this area met both quite well.
Still struggling with putting in a cleaning routine. When you've had to wing it for so long, it becomes second nature to go in spurts; hopefully something will form soon. I can't wait until this winter is done. I take the monkey to daycare in a stroller and it is very tough going when the sidewalks aren't ploughed. I would sooner have a cold day than a snow day anytime.
So yes, a bit more satisfied with life right now. Feeling a bit more able to let my guard down and be myself. What a great feeling.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Buzzing around
I swear, every time I feel like I am in a rhythm with blogging, something seems to disrupt me. It's almost like when you're determined to get back to the gym and feel great about going for a few days and then are stuck in meetings for the rest of the week. But you just keep plugging away, hoping one day you'll get it. Whether it is a great body or a great blog, it doesn't matter.
I was chatting to my girlfriends in my online community. A few of them hit the nail on the head as for what I've been feeling: Burnout
In short, the signs of burnout tend to be more mental than physical. They can include feelings of:
Let's see: check, check, check...oh yeah, big check on that irritability factor. Being crusty is something that is new to me, and that I've disliked in other people, but noticed myself creepily enjoying.
So the girls say to make sure to treat yourself to something good every day. I don't feel that I have time to do that, really. I can't just conk out for an hour to go and catch up on the latest celebrity goss, or whatever treating yourself is. But I've been slowly trying to give myself a bit of time. In fact, I've quite literally recognized that I will go crazy if I don't.
Oy. So back to buzzing around. I am finding things a bit more easier this past week or so. My body is starting to recognize that it can have some relaxation time on the weekends. That I don't have to push and push all the time. And while this outer stress dissolves, my inner balance seems to become a bit more settled.
All right, time to hit the showers. That was a good workout. Thanks for pacing me.
I was chatting to my girlfriends in my online community. A few of them hit the nail on the head as for what I've been feeling: Burnout
In short, the signs of burnout tend to be more mental than physical. They can include feelings of:
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So the girls say to make sure to treat yourself to something good every day. I don't feel that I have time to do that, really. I can't just conk out for an hour to go and catch up on the latest celebrity goss, or whatever treating yourself is. But I've been slowly trying to give myself a bit of time. In fact, I've quite literally recognized that I will go crazy if I don't.
Oy. So back to buzzing around. I am finding things a bit more easier this past week or so. My body is starting to recognize that it can have some relaxation time on the weekends. That I don't have to push and push all the time. And while this outer stress dissolves, my inner balance seems to become a bit more settled.
All right, time to hit the showers. That was a good workout. Thanks for pacing me.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Too capable to compete
"the South African runner's curved, prosthetic "Cheetah" blades are considered a technical aid in violation of the rules." In addition to this, a German professor claims "An athlete using this prosthetic blade has a demonstrable mechanical advantage (more than 30 per cent) when compared to someone not using the blade."
And so, Oscar now has the dual identity of being overadvantaged in the sports world and underadvantaged in the outside world, although he likely wouldn't let something as 'trivial' as not having legs stop him no matter where it is.
It's likely clear by now that I think he should be allowed to compete. Nevermind his prosthetics. How about all of the performance-enhancing drugs that "normal" athletes use? And while he may have a slight advantage as far as exertion during the race goes, due to his prosthetics, how about the amount of exertion he needs to generate for every single fucking day?
The final kicker, the thing that really burns me, is that I have the strong suspicion that rules are not put to such strong scrutiny for the Special Olympics. It's almost like putting everyone on the island of misfits and as long as you're a misfit, then the same rules do not apply.
It's wrong. It's the Olympics. Where has the human spirit gone?
And so, Oscar now has the dual identity of being overadvantaged in the sports world and underadvantaged in the outside world, although he likely wouldn't let something as 'trivial' as not having legs stop him no matter where it is.
It's likely clear by now that I think he should be allowed to compete. Nevermind his prosthetics. How about all of the performance-enhancing drugs that "normal" athletes use? And while he may have a slight advantage as far as exertion during the race goes, due to his prosthetics, how about the amount of exertion he needs to generate for every single fucking day?
The final kicker, the thing that really burns me, is that I have the strong suspicion that rules are not put to such strong scrutiny for the Special Olympics. It's almost like putting everyone on the island of misfits and as long as you're a misfit, then the same rules do not apply.
It's wrong. It's the Olympics. Where has the human spirit gone?
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Life after MBA
Life after MBA is definitely a strange and good place to be. I guess that technically, it's not entirely started yet because according to my friends still in school, classes aren't beginning until next week, but mentally I'm in the post era.
I'm not really doing anything radically different. Most of my time is being spent doing lots of cleaning. Digging my desk out from under the mounds of paper that accumulate in the end-of-semester frenzy. Actually putting away my clean clothes instead of piling them up (hey, they were in neat piles, at least!). Clearing off our kitchen table so that we can attempt eating there again instead of shoving food in our face in front of the t.v. Purging the bottom kitchen cupboards and making them functional for all the cooking and baking I now have time to do.
I must sound like such a slob -- if it's any better, just call it being human. ;)
Just after we came home from being up north for the holidays, the video card on our computer bit the dust. Luckily, all the stuff on the hard drive was fine. This was a tad ironic, as it's the computer that we bought when I started my MBA. It lasted for a good 4 years, so we decided to purchase a new one and transfer the hard drive onto a portable drive. Still working on getting the new one up and running with all of my preferred settings.
The most exciting thing, to me: I bought a keyboard!
It's only 61 keys, as opposed to 88 keys, which I'd been holding out for, but the price tag was so much lower than the 88 keys, I decided to go for it and I'm really glad that I did. Most of what is missing are the lower keys, but there is definitely enough here to satisfy my needs for now.
I've only had it set up for a couple of days, but it has already shown me that it's part of what I've really been missing. I'm not a huge t.v. watcher, but don't always have the mindset to read a book so I'd been substituting my piano time with time on the computer. While that has been fine, it hasn't left me feeling nearly as balanced as playing has. I'm a bit of an information junkie and could keep surfing all night long just reading more and more without ever feeling satisfied. In contrast, I derive such a sense of inner peace, an emotional connection, that I feel much more fulfilled and at balance with the world.
The keyboard also comes with a training program, Yamaha-style, that I want to explore. I was trained in the classical method and then completely broken reign with that at York and studied post-modern music. I think that any learning method adds value. It also has MIDI capability, and I would like to use that to begin composing again.
And in keeping with my previous entry on the effect of sound, I am going to pick up this book:
From the publisher:
I'm not really doing anything radically different. Most of my time is being spent doing lots of cleaning. Digging my desk out from under the mounds of paper that accumulate in the end-of-semester frenzy. Actually putting away my clean clothes instead of piling them up (hey, they were in neat piles, at least!). Clearing off our kitchen table so that we can attempt eating there again instead of shoving food in our face in front of the t.v. Purging the bottom kitchen cupboards and making them functional for all the cooking and baking I now have time to do.
I must sound like such a slob -- if it's any better, just call it being human. ;)
Just after we came home from being up north for the holidays, the video card on our computer bit the dust. Luckily, all the stuff on the hard drive was fine. This was a tad ironic, as it's the computer that we bought when I started my MBA. It lasted for a good 4 years, so we decided to purchase a new one and transfer the hard drive onto a portable drive. Still working on getting the new one up and running with all of my preferred settings.
The most exciting thing, to me: I bought a keyboard!
It's only 61 keys, as opposed to 88 keys, which I'd been holding out for, but the price tag was so much lower than the 88 keys, I decided to go for it and I'm really glad that I did. Most of what is missing are the lower keys, but there is definitely enough here to satisfy my needs for now.I've only had it set up for a couple of days, but it has already shown me that it's part of what I've really been missing. I'm not a huge t.v. watcher, but don't always have the mindset to read a book so I'd been substituting my piano time with time on the computer. While that has been fine, it hasn't left me feeling nearly as balanced as playing has. I'm a bit of an information junkie and could keep surfing all night long just reading more and more without ever feeling satisfied. In contrast, I derive such a sense of inner peace, an emotional connection, that I feel much more fulfilled and at balance with the world.
The keyboard also comes with a training program, Yamaha-style, that I want to explore. I was trained in the classical method and then completely broken reign with that at York and studied post-modern music. I think that any learning method adds value. It also has MIDI capability, and I would like to use that to begin composing again.
And in keeping with my previous entry on the effect of sound, I am going to pick up this book:
From the publisher: In this groundbreaking union of art and science, rocker-turned-neuroscientist Daniel J. Levitin explores the connection between music--its performance, its composition, how we listen to it, why we enjoy it--and the human brain. Drawing on the latest research and on musical examples ranging from Mozart to Duke Ellington to Van Halen, Levitin reveals:
-How composers produce some of the most pleasurable effects of listening to music by exploiting the way our brains make sense of the world
-Why we are so emotionally attached to the music we listened to as teenagers, whether it was Fleetwood Mac, U2, or Dr. Dre
-That practice, rather than talent, is the driving force behind musical expertise
-How those insidious little jingles (called earworms) get stuck in our heads
And, taking on prominent thinkers who argue that music is nothing more than an evolutionary accident, Levitin argues that music is fundamental to our species, perhaps even more so than language. This Is Your Brain on Music is an unprecedented, eye-opening investigation into an obsession at the heart of human nature.
Exciting times!Thursday, December 27, 2007
Bhutto assassinated
What a sad and scary event to mark the end of 2007. The death of a strong female leader, the upheaval of an already torn country. I'm still processing my thoughts on this. Right now, all I can do is feel -- anger, fear, sadness. And leave with some quotes from Benazir Bhutto.*****
"I told him on my oath in his death cell, I would carry on his work." – Recalling a visit to her father, former Prime Minister Zulfikar Ali Bhutto, before his execution in 1979.
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"The primary message of the visit and the talks will be that freedom has returned to Pakistan. It is not only a success for the people of Pakistan but for all those who believe in freedom." – Preparing for a visit to the United States in 1989, a few months after she first took office as prime minister.
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"The voter has gotten more demanding. In 1988, the voters just wanted democracy. Our campaign was much more general then. Now we are more specific." – 1993 Associated Press interview on her ultimately successful bid for re-election. She had been ousted in 1990.
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"I always said that I was innocent and a victim of a politically motivated trial." – Commenting in 2001 when her 1999 conviction on corruption charges was suspended and a new trial ordered.
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"I haven't given myself away. I belong to myself and I always shall." – Vowing in 1987 that her arranged Islamic marriage to Karachi businessman Asif Ali Zardari would not upstage her political career.
–––
"Democracy needs support and the best support for democracy comes from other democracies. Democratic nations should ... come together in an association designed to help each other and promote what is a universal value – democracy." – 1989 speech at Harvard University.
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"We have to modify our campaign to some extent because of the suicide bombings. We will continue to meet the public. We will not be deterred." – In October, shortly after narrowly escaping a suicide bombing on her return to Pakistan from an eight-year exile.
For posterity's sake
Here is the note I posted to my friends on my forum & fb.
Christmas came early this year...
because I'm done my MBA!!!! And now that I'm done, here's where I'll say my many long-owed thank-yous.
It still hasn't entirely sunk in, but it's finished and I am officially an MBA grad. What a trip! I've learned so much in the last 4 years and met so many interesting people. I know I've subjected you guys to mostly rants, but I am really going to miss the vast diversity of people and making fabulous new friends. People from Korea, India, China, Netherlands, France, England, Australia, U.S., Mexico, Iran, Germany, Denmark, and I'm sure I'm missing a lot more places. From across all industries and vocations, too. What an amazing experience! And the profs, too, some of whom I know I'll stay in touch with for a long, long time. Such a total gift and privilege to be able to get to know them.
And YOU GUYS!!! Thank you SO much for being here for me--for letting me vent, answering questions, encouraging me when I was down, helping me in subject areas I was struggling, never tiring of filling out endless surveys. I owe you a big debt of gratitude and I won't forget it.
And to my friends, both on and off the board, thank you for understanding when I couldn't make it out to events and patiently waiting for me to finish. I can't wait to be in touch and visiting more often.
And finally to my family... My husband for many, many nights flying solo with the monkey and picking up the slack when it came to housework. And listening to me bitch. And bitch and bitch and bitch. Lol! And still loving me endlessly through it. My mom and my il's for understanding how tired I am and how things could be overwhelming. My brothers and sister, for not caring if their cards were several weeks or months late.
And my little man.... For all those times he helped drive me to school and for colouring in my textbooks and for distracting me from the pressure and reminding me of what is really important in life.
Gah...I don't know what I did to deserve it all, but THANK YOU.
As much as I can't wait to move on and have my time back again, I will never forget this chapter in my life.
Christmas came early this year...
because I'm done my MBA!!!! And now that I'm done, here's where I'll say my many long-owed thank-yous.
It still hasn't entirely sunk in, but it's finished and I am officially an MBA grad. What a trip! I've learned so much in the last 4 years and met so many interesting people. I know I've subjected you guys to mostly rants, but I am really going to miss the vast diversity of people and making fabulous new friends. People from Korea, India, China, Netherlands, France, England, Australia, U.S., Mexico, Iran, Germany, Denmark, and I'm sure I'm missing a lot more places. From across all industries and vocations, too. What an amazing experience! And the profs, too, some of whom I know I'll stay in touch with for a long, long time. Such a total gift and privilege to be able to get to know them.
And YOU GUYS!!! Thank you SO much for being here for me--for letting me vent, answering questions, encouraging me when I was down, helping me in subject areas I was struggling, never tiring of filling out endless surveys. I owe you a big debt of gratitude and I won't forget it.
And to my friends, both on and off the board, thank you for understanding when I couldn't make it out to events and patiently waiting for me to finish. I can't wait to be in touch and visiting more often.
And finally to my family... My husband for many, many nights flying solo with the monkey and picking up the slack when it came to housework. And listening to me bitch. And bitch and bitch and bitch. Lol! And still loving me endlessly through it. My mom and my il's for understanding how tired I am and how things could be overwhelming. My brothers and sister, for not caring if their cards were several weeks or months late.
And my little man.... For all those times he helped drive me to school and for colouring in my textbooks and for distracting me from the pressure and reminding me of what is really important in life.
Gah...I don't know what I did to deserve it all, but THANK YOU.
As much as I can't wait to move on and have my time back again, I will never forget this chapter in my life.
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